"They still do those???"
I had my pre-op reconstruction appointment with my plastic surgeon on Friday. He's really concise and straight-forward while being incredibly comforting, which I admire and appreciate. I feel really grateful to live in Los Angeles and have really wonderful health insurance that allows access to a serious wealth of stellar providers and resources. I'm also incredibly happy to have found someone I feel so comfortable with. If not, it could make the whole measuring of my boobs, taking photos of ALL ANGLES of my boobs in a full-on plastic surgery photo studio and talking in great detail about my boobs while topless thing really awkward. But I'm embracing it and these ladies are about to say adios, so I'm giving them some time to shine.
When I went for my pre-op clearance physical after I met with the surgeon, the nurse doing my EKG found herself waltzing into the Why the fuck would you say that? series:
Her (cheerfully): So, what kind of surgery are you having? (Also, what the hell are medical charts for if you have to reiterate YOUR WHOLE STORY every time a new person comes into the room?)
Me: Double mastectomy with reconstruction
Her: Oh... What? But you are only 35!!!
Me: Yeah, cancer comes for people of all ages, unfortunately
Her: So how did you find it?
Me: Through self-exam
Her: They still do those??? (Am I they? Who is they?)
Me: Yeah, it's really scary but my prognosis is good and I'm really hoping all goes well
Her: Yeah, I know exactly how you are feeling. I had an abnormal mammogram once. It was really difficult. I mean, it turned out to be totally normal calcification and I'm completely fine and it never happened again, but, so, I just know exactly how you feel and what you are going through.
Annnnnnnnnnd, nope. Your boobs are fine and mine are getting straight up slaughtered in a week. You do not know.
On the bright side, some offices seem to have better robes or hospital gowns than others, and I'm pretty sure this pin striped number at the plastic surgeon's office is the best around.
When I went for my pre-op clearance physical after I met with the surgeon, the nurse doing my EKG found herself waltzing into the Why the fuck would you say that? series:
Her (cheerfully): So, what kind of surgery are you having? (Also, what the hell are medical charts for if you have to reiterate YOUR WHOLE STORY every time a new person comes into the room?)
Me: Double mastectomy with reconstruction
Her: Oh... What? But you are only 35!!!
Me: Yeah, cancer comes for people of all ages, unfortunately
Her: So how did you find it?
Me: Through self-exam
Her: They still do those??? (Am I they? Who is they?)
Me: Yeah, it's really scary but my prognosis is good and I'm really hoping all goes well
Her: Yeah, I know exactly how you are feeling. I had an abnormal mammogram once. It was really difficult. I mean, it turned out to be totally normal calcification and I'm completely fine and it never happened again, but, so, I just know exactly how you feel and what you are going through.
Annnnnnnnnnd, nope. Your boobs are fine and mine are getting straight up slaughtered in a week. You do not know.
On the bright side, some offices seem to have better robes or hospital gowns than others, and I'm pretty sure this pin striped number at the plastic surgeon's office is the best around.
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